Mom Really Does Know Best

A couple of months ago, my friend Dave and I decided to go to Disney World for the evening. As usual, vendors were selling all sorts of things that light up in the dark. On previous trips to Disney, I had mentioned how I had always wanted one of those light-up necklaces as a child, but my mother would never allow me to have one.

When I was a kid, amusement park vendors sold two things - balloons during the day, and glow-in-the-dark necklaces at night. Money was tight for my family. If we were lucky enough to get to go an amusement park in the first place, that was good enough. There was no way we were to expect any sort of money to be spent frivolously on silly disposable objects like glow-in-the-dark necklaces. Of course as a child, I really had no concept of the value of a dollar. I just knew that I saw other kids with these things and wished I could have one too. But Mom always held her ground. It wasn't going to happen.

While sitting on a bench at Disney, taking a break, Dave wandered off without saying anything. He returned shortly with a grand necklace that lit up and flashed in several colors! I was thrilled as every color of the rainbow danced around my neck in synchronized patterns! It only took me 40 years to get one! Proudly, I displayed my necklace as we wandered the park. The jealousy I could feel coming from the other children was palpable.

One hour later, my necklace quit working.

I set out to find another vendor and was pleased to find out that they were happy to exchange it for a new one. Again, I felt like a celebrity and was happy that all the other children were once again envious.

But it was not to last. I noticed that one of the lights on my new necklace was not working. So I waited in line again at the vendor’s cart to get another new one. Now with my third necklace flashing brilliantly I was once again satisfied.

Not more than an hour after my final exchange, Dave and I rode Space Mountain. During the ride the thing flew off my shoulders straight up into the air and disappeared into dark depths of the ride, never to be seen again.

To hell with it. Mom was right. Things don't bring people happiness. Thanks Mom.